Foolish

I knew from the beginning that it wouldn't work out, but I let myself fall in love with her anyway.

Foolish

Try

I always told her it was easier to hate than it was to love or forgive.
I thought she would be brave enough to try.

Sadly I was wrong. Again.

The beauty of being Human

I have gotten away from my disclaimers. I used to pronounce often that I encourage you to go and do research yourself. As I am inviting you to do so. I do not look for you to agree with me. I want you to find the truth.

Keep others perspectives in mind as you research. The entire world is at your fingertips right now. And whilst listening to me is a start, do not rely on me as a source.

I am giving my broad view of the world that I see. I am not always right. I sometimes disagree with myself as I go back and listen to the things I have said. But I take that new inspiration into my venture. Highlighting the importance of not believing anything, never taking it for face value, always looking for another way. I am not so conceited as to think that I'm correct and should never question my own words. I, myself question them all the time. It is the evolution of thought, always being open to suggestion and information is the beauty of being human.

Too many people on this earth have decided that what they believe is the truth without question. The problem with this is that excludes everyone who doesn't believe it. Further no two people can possibly believe and feel the same way about one thing.

Each person interprets information differently based on many factors. Mainly personal interest in material importance. A hungry man may feel it is much more important to get his next meal than it is to vote. A rich man may think it is more important to invest his money wisely than to pray.

Because there is no absolute similarity between any two humans than the motivation on acting on impulse, desire or need. This is why truth is a complicated thing. What is true to you may be more or less true to the person who sits next to you in the train. He may disagree with you entirely. He may even become angry or violent if you tell him that he's wrong or proclaim that what you believe is true instead.

In my life I have met many people who have shared with me things they believed to be true. That can't be denied. I too have said things in the past that at the time seemed unbreakable to me. I have been in relationships that were based on the very thing. The shared believe in something.

Somewhere in history I stepped back and considered my position among them. Sometimes I was upset when they didn't share my enthusiasm or conviction. Sometimes I was jealous when they seemed to be stronger in faith than I. So when I considered my position, I realized that it wasn't something in them that was stronger or weaker. It was all about priority, convenience and sometimes as a means of gratification.

At this point I decided that not only the truth was relative and abstract but it was also dynamic.

Relatively speaking the amount of information that satisfies you and makes you decide on something may not be enough for the next person. Or maybe overwhelming to them.

Two entirely different types of information may lead two entirely different people to the same conclusion. One scientific and the other philosophical, for instance.

Truth in any form isn't an abstraction. Therefore there is no true way to see anything. As no two eyes can physically share the same perspective. It is no exception to say that two minds cannot see anything exactly as it is meant to be seen or considered. There is no way to bring up all relevant facts into a statement. Convincing every single targeted individual of anything. As I may have a preconception about it, just as you might.

A Parent may not agree with abortion for example, because they have children and know the joy of bringing life into this world. But one who has never had children can easily say that abortion should simply be a choice. Because it is not a life until it has seen the light of day. And that child may know nothing but a hard life maybe. However I know that every mother knows for sure the child was alive and part of her as she raised it inside of her. No matter if it is born or not, with or without the ability to provide everything for a child it's worth each and every minute, just because they are alive.

See how easy it is to change perspective and never be able to answer it for someone else.

The mother is not wrong, nor is the person without children. It's a matter of perspective. These truths are dynamic. Each and every statement invites more facts for consideration, more possibilities for pondering upon. Each development has infinite variables based on whom you ask and final variables. Considering anything you must remember that not only that event is still unfolding, but also every single person that learns of it, is interpreting it in a different way. So no matter whom you ask in the future, you might find a slightly different version of the story. In fact, the person that you ask may have had to believe in what they saw or heard changed over time into new input of information. And you will be the recipient of all inclusive little and numerous facts they have picked up along the way.

And even though this person may have witnessed the very same thing you did. Their idea may drastically differ from yours. Not to mention there are six billion people on this planet right now. All influencing one and other. No wonder it is so hard to find an equilibrium. But what if there is no equilibrium. What if information evolves so fast that it will never become resolved.

The only thing we can do with facts is to take them into consideration for future reference. And I can assure you that it does evolve very fast. In fact I feel like that is the only real truth out there. Truth is more than a virtue that a person can have, a search and a need for truth. Am I saying that we all search in vain? Hardly!

Because to resign yourself to believing anything is foolish. Believe is a powerful word, it means that you're search is over. That you have nothing else to learn. The truth is no longer relative for you can share it. And it is no longer abstract as you can see it. You aren't open for suggestion so it ceases to be dynamic.

Believe means that you can no longer learn. Even above the things, which you believe, for their nature is dynamic as well. Ever evolving, forever abstract and relative as it is your believe, as you see it.

Negating the possibility to share it because of its dynamic nature. Not even faith is powerful enough to overcome the nature of truth. Faith is inherently blind without question.

When you stop questioning reality, you cease to embrace free will. Though this is what makes you human, the search for truth is paramount, despite me, for I have told you the truth can't be obtained. But should you give up on it, the truth will escape you, as the search for truth is the true liberty afforded to you by god in the form of free will, no matter what you believe god to be.

I don't believe that I have an idea that god is true. Dynamics, abstraction and relativity. These are the things, I believe, the laws of truth. But that's just my opinion isn't it?

I want you to share this with someone and see what conversation it starts. Remember the importance of search for truth. For the survival of the human species as a whole. The importance of lying our differences aside and having a good conversation.

Hallway

We bump into each other in the hall and share a moment that can only be termed awkward.
I try to find the right thing to say, but the appropriate words seem lost to me.
She smiles sheepishly and gives excuses. "I'll talk to you later," she says.
I know it isn't true.

Dancing at work

We move the coffeetable to the side.
And stand before each other. Too close for comfort. I try not to look into her eyes but still listen to what she says.
She steps back and forth again. Then to the left and to the right.
After a few tries and a few laughs I grab her hand and and pull her close to me, as I look into her eyes. She lets go and says she needs music to do this.
I know her better than that.
She spends 10 minutes looking for the right song.
She comes back and grabs my hand and we start to dance.