All over again

It's happening all over again....all the uncertainty...all the dependence and relevance and burdening.
I have become better and better in faking it. trying to be helpful and understanding but to be honest I don't think I can take it anymore....
I hate the fact they are nice to me...
I hate the fact they are friendly towards me....
I hate the fact they see me as a friend....
I hate the fact they remember me.....
I hate the fact they think they can talk to me....
I hate the fact they depend on me...
I hate the fact they feel safe around me....
I hate the fact they STILL know me....
I hate the fact I can't tell them to go fuck themselves....
I hate the fact I'm so nice....or atleast fake to be nice....
I hate them rubbing their happiness in my face.....

I'm even tired of hating to be honest....